From Dr. Tara Christie Kinsey, Head of School
August 19, 2025
Dear Country Day Community,
On the eve of our first day of school, I write to share a back-to-school message (below) about our focus for the year: nurturing a culture in which everyone knows and feels that they truly matter. Many independent schools claim that they do this, but it's actually very hard to do and do well.
This is why we invited everyone to join in the summer community read, Never Enough: When Achievement Culture Becomes Toxic—and What We Can Do About It, by Jennifer Wallace. If you haven’t yet had the chance to read the book, we strongly encourage all members of the Country Day community to join our faculty, staff, and board of trustees in reading the book or downloading and listening to the audiobook to be a part of the conversation. As one Country Day Upper School parent recently wrote to me:
Thank you for encouraging every household to read Never Enough. I found myself audibly saying, "Yes!" as I read each page. And I quickly realized that the messaging I've been sending my children was likely doing more harm than good, despite my seemingly best efforts and desire for the contrary. While we have always had open and vulnerable conversations as a family, this book allowed us to dive deeper, giving our children more ways to express how they've been feeling and how my husband and I can better see, hear, and empower them in the ways they want and need during this pressure-filled time in their lives. They've both said on several occasions, “Thank you for talking with us about this.” It makes me get emotional typing those words. There is nothing better than when your children feel seen and know that they matter, so thank you. Thank you for your courage and for knowing what our children need and how we can support them."
When school and home come together around a shared set of values, our children are the beneficiaries.
Let’s make it a great year!
Dr. Tara Christie Kinsey
Head of School
A Back-to-School Message from Head of School Dr. Tara Christie Kinsey
At the end of my first week on campus this summer, I traveled to the hospital to visit long-serving Chief Financial Officer David Mancos, who had just come out of back surgery. Ever the good soldier, David had quietly and without fanfare waited long enough for me to relocate to Charlotte so that he could “stand down” for a few weeks to take care of his health. As has been noted by many others before me, David Mancos is a testament to the soul, resilience, and enduring spirit of Country Day. Cheerful in his hospital room, David asked me about my family, which naturally led to a wide-ranging conversation about our childhoods and how our life experiences inform our leadership. When I asked David what his favorite book on leadership was, he didn’t hesitate: "Ma'am, I'm a big fan of It Worked For Me by Colin Powell.” I told him that while I was a fan of Powell, I had never read the book. On my way home, I downloaded the audiobook and listened to it while unpacking moving boxes. In the Afterword, Powell quotes from a speech by Admiral Hyman Rickover: "Organizations don't get things done. Plans and programs don't get things done. Only people get things done. Organizations, plans, and programs either help or hinder people."
As we begin the 2025–26 school year, we will soon be busy rolling out “plans and programs” that will shape our hours, days, weeks, and months here at Country Day. But before we begin, let us take a step back and embrace the very simple but often overlooked fact that the best schools are, first and foremost, about the learning and growth of people—the students themselves as well as the adults who engage with our students day in and day out. This is why I often say that I don’t care what your title is; if you work in a school, you are an educator.
Our mission states that “Charlotte Country Day School develops the potential of each student by fostering intellectual curiosity, principled character, ethical leadership, and a responsibility to serve,” so our very reason for existence is explicitly tied to students’ learning and growth. It therefore stands to reason that any “plans and programs” will be only as successful as their ability to unlock the potential of students, faculty, staff, and parents. Our mission is powerful because there is nothing more impactful or optimistic than one human being helping another human being learn and grow to their full potential.
As I have some of my first conversations with members of the Country Day community, I’ve been asked to articulate what makes a great teacher. As a school, we will be further clarifying what constitutes mastery-level teaching at Country Day. In the meantime, here are some fundamental truths:
- The best teachers don’t just teach their curriculum; they teach students.
- They know how to connect authentically with their students and will move mountains to pique their curiosity and intrinsic motivation to learn. They tune in to their students and pay close attention to what makes them tick.
- They have high standards for their students and provide high levels of scaffolding, support, and actionable feedback to help their students achieve those high standards.
- They inspire their students to work harder than they’ve ever worked before in their lives—not to earn praise or a “good grade,” but to learn new content and skills to make the world a better place.
When we get it right, the best teachers are not just teachers—we are mentors, life coaches, motivators, and lifelong sources of inspiration. Perhaps most of all, the best teachers help students feel and know that they truly matter—to their teachers, to their classmates, to their school community, and to society. And not just because of what students achieve, but because of who they are.
This is why we invited everyone to join in the summer community read, Never Enough: When Achievement Culture Becomes Toxic—and What We Can Do About It, by Jennifer Wallace. If you haven’t yet had the chance to read the book, we strongly encourage all Country Day parents to join our faculty, staff, and administration in reading the book or downloading and listening to the audiobook. For those of you who wish to go further, you might listen to this recent NAIS podcast with Jennifer Wallace and me discussing how prioritizing teacher well-being is reshaping how we think about “student success” in our schools.
We are pleased that Jennifer will be visiting Country Day on November 4 to join us in what I believe is the most important conversation for schools today: everyone—from faculty and staff, to parents and caregivers, to students themselves—knowing that who they are and what they do truly matters. Between now and November 4, I will be asking all of us to keep the conversation afloat—in our classrooms, our dining halls, and our homes. As Jennifer suggests, this is a radical new lens for seeing our children and showing them their worth to us, to others, and to society. And if we’re being really honest, it’s a radical new lens for seeing one another as adults, too.
To realize our goal of graduates who are healthy, happy, high-achievers, and who have developed intellectual curiosity, principled character, ethical leadership, and a responsibility to serve, we must challenge the norms around toxic achievement culture—to expose the ugly reality inside the pressure cooker—to build a healthier environment in which can all aim high and achieve our highest aspirations. I look forward to your active participation in this important school-wide conversation to benefit each and every member of this community—faculty, staff, parents, and, most especially, students.
As we begin this school year, let us remember that great schools grow from the hearts of great teachers—and that when educators feel seen, supported, and inspired, they create the conditions where every student can thrive.